Jersey Shore: Family Vacation - Season 2 Episode 14
Jersey Shore Family Vacation Recap: Single Ronnie Rides Again
We selection upwardly with Angelina and Vinny where we left them concluding week. Their sexual tension has boiled off and now the pot is scorched. So permit's exercise what whatever responsible person would practice: surrender, leave it exist, and try to pretend for every bit long as possible that you don't notice the mess. Out on the deck, Nicole runs abroad from a mosquito. "Don't touch me," she screams. "You're going to sting me and then I'grand going to crawling for years." This is better than whatever way I could think of to sum upwards Vinny'south feelings towards Angelina.
Fortunately, nosotros can cleanse our spirits with the soothing and grounding ritual that is the enormous burger claiming at Headliner. Mike, alternately Pauly and Vinny's "thoroughbred" and "fat Rocky," has been training his whole life for this moment. Raging Beef will have x minutes to polish off what looks similar 10 patties, half a dozen strips of salary, and four or five onion rings toothpicked on meridian, plus chips. It's never been done.
And yet, once the countdown begins, Mike refuses to adopt the hyper-efficient, buns-dunking mania of an actual competitive eater. He can't aid savoring the monster dish, hailing it every bit "perfectly cooked" and "a 10." The fact that he finishes more one-half of the burger in a leisurely fashion, never not enjoying himself, is somehow more than impressive than if he'd consumed it all within the time limit.
Oddly enough, it is Nicole, non Mike, who ends up barfing. This would be an unremarkable beliefs for a human existence who has been continually consuming booze for 96 hours except for the fact that Nicole never, ever pukes—and she and Jionni have been trying for another baby… While the others caput for the social club, Jenni takes Nicole to a pharmacy for a pregnancy examination. She is non pregnant, to her thwarting, which nearly certainly would have non been the example during a hypothetical pregnancy scare on an early on season of the original Bailiwick of jersey Shore. How far we've come!
Hanging with the group at Headliner (aye, we're dorsum) is Angelina'south friend Lindsay, who prefers to be known as Jewish Barbie. Ron spends much of the evening staring angrily at his phone. Jen has been sending him photos of Sammi with her new boyfriend, saying that this is how happy she, too, will be once she finds a new guy to raise their daughter. The CIA should rent Jen as a consultant to kick effectually some new enhanced interrogation techniques. "This is my friend Single Ronnie," Pauly tells Lindsay. "Just kidding! I mean, I don't know."
Pauly and Vinny have been competing all night for JB's angel, but when she joins the grouping in heading dorsum to the firm, a dark horse emerges. Ronnie climbs into the girls' cab, an act of sexual espionage. He wastes no time in deploying his trademark aggressive, irresistible brand of flirting.
RON: "You want swimming?"
LINDSAY: "What?"
RON: "Go pond?"
LINDSAY: "Is it heated?"
RON: "Yeah, it is. All right, so you go swimming?"
RON: "Maybe."
LINDSAY: "All right. Permit's do it."
Nicole texts the boys a photo of Ron and JB sitting together. Her caption: "Another French fry."
In a confessional, Ronnie says he knows everyone thinks he's well-nigh to reheat those fries. "I'g non spiraling similar that, yet," he protests. But in the kitchen, Ronnie takes a swig of liquor, then a swig of carmine juice. Who even drinks cherry juice? Not people who are non spiraling, I'll tell you that much.
Angelina asks JB who she thinks the cutest of "the iii" is, and when she demurs, prompts her to play "eff, marry, go rid of.." Get rid of? Mike. (Mike was not part of "the three" and you know it, adult female.) Marry? Pauly. Fuck? Let's merely say his name rhymes with Yanni. Hearing this, Nicole buries her face in her coating. It'due south over.
Ron mutters to himself, "I think I should go to bed," so begins panting. He does non go to bed. At the sight of JB in her bikini, he rolls confront-down on the floor, as if mourning the bad decisions he knows he's about to make. Nicole asks who's getting in the hot tub. "I'll go," Ron answers immediately, so tacks on a half-hearted "I guess." It's one thing to make a terrible decision and then repeat it. Information technology's another thing to make a terrible decision, take that decision air on national telly, and and so however echo it.
Peering through a window, Vinny offers Richard Attenborough-inflected color commentary as Ron and JB dip their legs into the pool. Information technology's simply now that I notice the house's very sparkly pool toys are in the shape of an extremely phallic log and extremely yonic ring.
"So y'all're still not unmarried yet," opens Jewish Barbie, only Ron's only response is lighting a cigarette. Past at present Vinny, Pauly, Mike, and Nicole are all standing at the windows, mystified, horrified, and utterly transfixed past this psychosexual abandoned vehicle.
Ron removes his shirt. They movement from the pool to the jacuzzi. Oh god, oh no. As Vinny explains, "The jacuzzi is, similar, ratchet time." That's where Ron'south paw kickoff became acquainted with the original French fry's donkey. JB removes her robe. "She'southward inching in, she'due south inching in—she's in! She'south in the hottub," Vinny exclaims, with gooooooooooal enthusiasm. For at present, at least, they remain a respectful five anxiety away from each other.
Inside, Jenni gets a text from Jen: She tin't become a concur of Ron. A hush falls over the peanut gallery. In a confessional, Jenni and Nicole pronounce their a friend a great guy, only a "bag of fucking dicks" as a fellow.
Jewish Barbie compliments ane of Ronnie's tattoos, and then all of them. At present they're but nearly three feet away from i another. Watching from the window is no longer enough, then the roomies accept information technology upon themselves to upgrade their seats, crawling out onto the balcony. Mike has even made popcorn for the occasion.
They leave of the jacuzzi, but the night is young. Jewish Barbie asks to borrow a shirt. Ron tells her she tin sleep in his bed. She scoots under the coating.
"And at that place goes my life," he says in the dark.
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Source: https://www.vulture.com/2018/11/jersey-shore-family-vacation-recap-season-2-episode-14.html
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